You don't need the perfect words. You need to not flinch. Someone trusts you enough to say it out loud - a hard thing to hear, and an easy moment to get wrong by panicking, lecturing, or going silent. What they need most in that moment is simpler than it feels.
If you are in immediate danger, stop reading and call your local emergency number now - 911 in the US and Canada, 999 in the UK and Ireland, 000 in Australia, 111 in New Zealand, or 112 across most of Europe.
You're not responsible for fixing this alone, and you shouldn't try to carry it by yourself either - a crisis line or counselor exists exactly for backup. See the note above for the one where you live.
Services and numbers change over time. If one of these is wrong or missing for your country, telling us is worth more than anything else on this page.
The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 1-800-799-7233, or text START to 88788, 24/7 and confidential (thehotline.org). To report a child being groomed or exploited online, contact the NCMEC CyberTipline at 1-800-843-5678 or CyberTipline.org. For a mental-health crisis, call or text 988; call 911 for immediate danger.
Kids Help Phone supports anyone up to 29, day or night, at 1-800-668-6868 or by texting CONNECT to 686868. For domestic violence, your province runs its own helpline - search "[your province] domestic violence helpline" or call 211 to be connected. Call or text 988 for a mental-health crisis; call 911 for immediate danger.
Refuge runs the UK's National Domestic Abuse Helpline free, 24/7, at 0808 2000 247. For a child at risk, call the NSPCC helpline at 0808 800 5000, or Childline at 0800 1111 if you're the young person. Report online grooming to CEOP at ceop.police.uk. Samaritans (116 123) will listen any time; call 999 for immediate danger.
1800RESPECT is Australia's national sexual assault and domestic/family violence counselling line, 24/7, at 1800 737 732. Kids Helpline is 1800 55 1800. Report online grooming or exploitation to the eSafety Commissioner (esafety.gov.au) or ThinkUKnow. Lifeline (13 11 14) offers crisis support; call 000 for immediate danger.
Women's Refuge runs a crisis line 24/7 at 0800 733 843. Netsafe (netsafe.org.nz) takes reports of online grooming and harm. For general crisis support, call or text 1737 any time. Call 111 for immediate danger.
Women's Aid runs a 24-hour National Freephone Helpline at 1800 341 900. The Rape Crisis Centre's national helpline is 1800 77 8888, and Childline (ISPCC) is 1800 66 66 66 for children and young people. Report child sexual abuse material online at Hotline.ie. Call 112 or 999 for immediate danger.
There isn't one worldwide number, so use a directory you can trust: Befrienders Worldwide (befrienders.org) lists real crisis lines by country, and Child Helpline International (childhelplineinternational.org) does the same for children and teens. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, contact your local emergency number right now.
Thank them for telling you, and mean it. Telling you was the hard part. A steady "I'm glad you told me" does more than any carefully worded response, and reacting with visible disgust or panic teaches them not to say it again.
Not usually. Most self-harm is a way of coping with unbearable feeling rather than an attempt to die. It does raise risk over time, though, so it is worth taking seriously without treating it as an automatic emergency.
No. A promise extracted under pressure mostly teaches them to hide it better, and it turns a slip into a betrayal of you rather than a hard day for them. Aim for staying in contact, not for a pledge.
When a wound needs medical care, when they have taken something, or when they tell you they are thinking about ending their life. Then it stops being a conversation and becomes a call to emergency services or a crisis line.
If they are a minor, or if you believe they are in danger, yes, and it is fair to tell them you are going to. Keeping a secret that large alone is not a favor to either of you.
Most people show signs before a crisis, not just during one. Here's what to actually watch for, and what to say.
You do not have to fix it. You just have to be the person who does not look away.
Not everyone who plays a lot has a problem. Here's the actual difference.
Hotline advocates spend most of their time talking with people still working out whether their situation counts. You are allowed to call to think out loud.